Arguing Gets You Nowhere

          I can’t grasp the concept of arguing with officials in youth sports. Unless you’re talking about a rule that’s not being properly observed, coaches who argue with officials at the youth level are wasting their time, and wasting coachable moments.

         Let’s establish one thing. Most youth sports officials, regardless of sport, are not very good. They usually fall into one (or more than one) of four categories.

1.       1. They’re now to officiating that sport and have to pay their dues reffing little kids before they can move up.

2.      2.  They’re making a few extra buck on the side because while the day job may pay most of the bills, they could use a little spending money.

3.       3. They’re at the tail end of their officiating career and have come back down to youth games after officiating high school or college.

4.       4. They’ve be officiating forever, they’ve never been good at it, and they’re stuck with kids.

It doesn’t really matter which of these four categories they fit in. Suffice to say it’s not their full time gig.

        Every once in a while, you see a great official at the youth level. They’re consistent, they’re fair, they’re just the right amount of serious, they're helping the kids without interfering with the coaches, and they get all the calls right. When you get that ump or referee, every parent and coach says the same thing. “Why can’t we have this guy every game?”

The reason you can’t get that ref consistently is simple. Everyone wants them and they can pick and choose their assignments. And if you’re a thorn in their side, they’re picking a different assignment.

So, what good does arguing do? Most officials have a quick trigger with coaches who consistently argue every call. I’ve umped enough games and been around enough officials to know that pain-in-the-butt coaches don’t get the calls that the sensible coach gets. It doesn’t matter if it’s fair. It’s true.

Moreover, spending your energy arguing a call sends the wrong message. Usually, if a play was close, the kid you’re coaching could have done something better to make it not-so-close. Hustling out of the batter’s box could have made the bang-bang play at first an easy infield single. The holding call by your right tackle on the outside run might not have been called if the kid took a better first step and established leverage.

Remember, as youth coaches, we are coaching all the time. The coach who shows up to practice and wastes the first 15 minutes of practice is teaching his players that it’s OK to be unprepared. The coach who leaves the field and immediately grabs a cigarette is teaching his players that it’s OK to smoke. And the coach that argues every call is telling the kids on the team that it’s OK to blame somebody else for their own failure.

How about the basketball official who calls a blocking foul every time down the court whenever a girl drives the lane? The perpetual arguing coach gets on the ref. Maybe the coach should be emphasizing denying the pass to the wing or defending more closely on the perimeter so her girls don’t get in the situation to get called for a block.

I’ve heard coach after coach say, “Ref, you’ve made that same call four times.” Insanity is doing the same thing the same way and expecting a different result, right? Expect the same result. Change the message to your team. That’s coaching.

Of course, this is not to say that it's not right to speak to an official about their calls. Those friendly conversations can go a long way with that official. Ans sometimes, the call is so bad that it's almost impossible to keep your mouth shut. Trust me. The official knows that they missed that call.  

                When I recruit high school athletes, I try to stay away from the kids who blame officials for losses. For many athletes, the officials are a non-factor. They’re the athletes I want to coach. Judge early in the game how the game is being officiated and adjust. The team that does that more effectively will likely have an easier time with the officials late in the game. And the team that blames the officials for a loss are the ones that are missing out on opportunities to improve.